Shiny Like Chrome

This Google news is intriguing. First there was Chrome the browser: clearly aimed at freeing them from Internet Explorer’s crotchety old ways and Firefox’s independent whims. And now there is Chrome the OS: game over for Windows WTF OMG ROFL and so forth. That’s some bold intent on show from Google. As an Apple running Google user, I must say it’s exactly what I’ve wanted them to do for years.

I’m a firm believer in the notion that the great majority of people scarcely run local applications any more. The browser, just like Google said when introducing Chrome, to most intents and purposes is the OS. Google is already at the vanguard of that movement, taking on Microsoft Office at its weakest points with Google Docs, namely collaboration and price, and Gmail is a pretty solid web app for anyone used to Hotmail or basic use of Outlook. Hint: that’s a whole freaking lot of people. For a long time now, it’s been looking like Google is perfectly safe where it is, remaining platform agnostic while Microsoft and Apple and the rest duke it out. But, to their credit, Google’s strategists didn’t quite think like that. Something woke them up a few years ago.

I think it was the iPhone. In January 2007 when the iPhone was first announced, Google appeared on stage with glowing praise about the power of the web in your pocket. Yahoo were there too, remember them? Unlike their ancient rival though, Google had decided to play a bigger rôle in the smartphone market than they were letting on at Apple’s keynote. They had Android in the works. And Chrome.

There’s been a lot written about Android on the NetBook as well as on the phone. So far it’s not come to much. I’m not really an Android afficionado anyhow. Not until it starts to show the same kind of promise as Palm has done in the Pre. But Chrome OS on the laptop … now there’s a thought.

Google isn’t motivated by direct profit from software sales. This is an immense advantage compared to BeOS, OS/2, and the handful of other ludicrously archaic sounding commercial rivals Windows has slaughtered over its many years. Google isn’t motivated by selling hardware either. This opens up the cheap and nasty underbelly of the global market Apple cares not to touch. And Google isn’t immersed within the fractured politics of the open source movement in the same way as Ubuntu’s Canonical and Firefox’s Mozilla. Google makes its money through ads. That’s a terrific strength, given how they dominate this field. It means that if there’s one outfit in the world right now who can unilaterally make the Grand Unified Linux and get it on to hundreds of millions of machines, they are it.

If there were at last a time to displace Windows as the software of default on low end hardware, it has come. Google brings to Linux what no one else has managed so far: consistency and, I hope, common sense. If Google’s trademark minimalism can be brought off on the desktop, we could be really talking.

There’s already some squeamishness about this among believers in free software. It’s the same force against standardising on anything which has kept their products restricted to such a self-enforcing niche. But I know where the panic will really be felt. 2009 is turning out to be another trying year for Microsoft. How are they going to have to price Windows 7 to compete with Google’s free? How many more years will old granma XP be kept on life support to suit the lowest end hardware Google is targeting? That’s not a place you want to be. Expect some pretty hard wriggling out of Microsoft.

So, yes, I’m pretty stoked about Chrome OS. I’d be even happier if they gave it a catchier name, but the idea alone will do. Mac fanatic that I am, I’m unlikely to buy a system running it but the more power HTML 5 and all open standards receive, the better it is for my platform too. So here’s to the best of luck for Google.

I have to wonder though: will they give a fuck about Flash? Hope not.

Prequel to the Sequel

The reason it’s important that the Pre succeeds is so the mobile market doesn’t wind up like the desktop market — with just one single great experience, alone in a sea of crap.

This is where I differ with Gruber: Windows is the problem with the desktop computer market. That pile of shite rode on its brother’s coattails (remember DOS?) which itself was an artifact of IBM’s perceived power in the early 80’s. The desktop computer market (increasingly the laptop computer market now of course) is a fluke, not the general rule. C.f. pundit predictions for the iPod and iPhone — always based on the Mac v PC experience — and the startlingly different reality.

There used to be a wealth of ingenuity and innovation on the desktop too. The Amiga and Atari ST come to mind, and of course Acorn’s Archimedes. These platforms were all destroyed by the industry’s drive to “interoperability”, or strict conformity as that meant back then. Usability be damned! The Macintosh was almost killed too, surviving only thanks to the publishing niche it had fostered. If Commodore, Acorn and Atari could have lasted until the web — not Windows — became the global platform, how different would things be now? The PC story is a tragic comedy.

The Pre is a bit of a shameless rip off in some places, but at least it’s no Windows, Mobile or otherwise. Indeed, it has a promising alternate model for how many tasks are accomplished. I wish it the moderate best too, because Palm have one hell of a hill to climb, coming to the iPhone party a full two years and a billion downloads late. But the Pre is not the sole guardian between the smartphone market and the reeking cesspit which is the world of Vista. There’s no IBM to fuck this one up, no matter Microsoft’s prayers.

And Now: Star Trek

Who said Twitter wasn’t about writing reviews?

Saw Star Trek last night. Better than I expected. Officially “alright”. Could have been much worse. Not a classic though. Scotty was popular before the Morningside, Edinburgh audience. Could have used some trombone whenever his pet alien appeared though. I’d already heard young Kirk was a dick. But he appeared much more likeable than that. Was it all the times he got hit in the face? The music wasn’t good - oddly enough the car chase bit people complain about was the best - and the lens flare was indeed all there. Not a fan of the singularity physics either. But must always remember this is Star Trek… Plot was typical Star Trek big screen. As in convoluted and better in the buildup than the release. But overall, it did work. The Uhura-Spock thing wasn’t overdone to a cringe. Sulu didn’t unleash Kung-Fu whip ass despite all expectations. Alternate timeline was a bit of a cop out, yet understandable given the clear desire to make sequels of this prequel. I’m a picky bastard when it comes to SciFi so this wasn’t really at all bad. Easily the best rejuvenation of a classic I’ve seen in years.

about 2 hours ago from Twitterrific

Maybe there’s some rule about not multi-posting in some people’s minds, somewhere out there I don’t give a shit about. 140 characters just winds up being a good way to encourage punchy sentences. No; thank you:- excess punctuation!

The Art of Turkish Star Wars

Just watched Indiana Jones save the Earth and return home to the Death Star. No shit! #TurkishStarWars

2:41 AM May 3rd from TwitterFon

I saw this last week. “The Turkish Star Wars”, as it’s often called, thanks largely to the copious use of bootlegged footage. It is, I think it fair to say, one of the most singularly bat-shit insane movies ever made. Its inspirations come from far more than just Star Wars – Indiana Jones soundtrack is pilfered, as is Battlestar Galactica’s – and its martial arts training montage is bizarre homage to Bruce Lee. At least I think. This is a film where you can never really know!

Something I quite liked was the way Flash Gordon and Battlestar Galactica were raided for ideas. As, to put it mildly: this film makes no sense. It seems very likely that the makers were perplexed by the original Star Wars they had raided for shots and backdrops, and decided their resulting home-made Sci-Fi stew could use another few flavours.

Even the concept of space is confused in this story. Sometimes the Earth is just a planet, but sometimes it’s The World and the entire extent of the universe. The evil wizard – Emperor? no: wizard – decides to destroy it, while standing on it, making no clear sign of intention to leave. That’s pretty fucked up right there. Though if it’s not enough for you, did I mention his army of cookie monster minions?

I bet the people who went to see this on its theatrical release in Turkey in the early 1980’s must have been in for a treat. Especially as the real Star Wars was not originally shown there. No, this was it.

If you’ve an evening in need of the surreal, which to be fair was made with a few laughs clearly in mind, I can commend the freely available Turkish Star Wars as a suitably freaky feast. Watch it if you dare.

On an almost appropriately far-fetched tangent of a link, also have a few seconds for this. The clouds were my idea.

Lost Geocities

“No, it’s important equally much for the content as the fact it’s the first time many people used the web and wanted to be a part of it. The process of human beings coming online and being given a potential audience of millions is a specific and unique situation in human history, and should be captured.”

But Bits Were Born to be Free?!?

I’ll freely admit that I have Transmission around for the occasional download. It makes sense for unavailable old shows or live bootlegs. So I’m not as “anti-piracy” as many who like to weigh in, Manichean style, on the issue.

But I must say it’s amusing to see the vanguard of “no: you have no fucking right to charge money for your work!” trying to get some dough of their own.

Computers, and the global network joining them together, are based on copying data. It’s how everything works, like it or not. Ergo bootlegging (or “piracy” to those who’ve never heard of the real deal) is trivial. It takes effort to prevent this kind of thing. Effort with a large risk of annoying your best customers.

Let’s just put it this way: iTunes and Amazon can do a swift trade in DRM free music because there’s value in that service. I fancy their chances for dominating video, longterm, far better than BluRay.

But when you find yourself in a spot where no store carries the obscure shit you’re looking for, well, just make sure your torrent client is open source.

Single Lens Reflex

You walk down the stairs and to the door. The sun’s low. Shadows crawl the hallway. People hurry by on the pavement, talking to themselves, uninterested in the man whose eyes blink from the brightness. It’s not just the light though. Something’s wrong.

“Real life has no HUD.”

It’s true. That’s what’s missing. Your eyes twitch, searching for the numbers and controls which are not there. It’s unnerving. It’s just you, the world and your camera.

Welcome to Single Lens Reflex.

Oh Fuck, Fuck, Fuck, Fucking Fuck

Imagine it was Apple whose profits had fallen 90% year on year. Go on: give it a shot. Then compare with the media “meh” to this one. Groobs is right: the silence, and the duplicitous narcissism, is deafening.

Zune HD

Over a week late for April Fool’s.

“What do people love about the iPhone? The interface … nah. The apps … surely not. How about the hardware? Yeah, it must be the hardware. Let’s cram 720p inside the same space. Oh they are so busted!”

I love how Microsoft are so determined to act out the “beleaguered” fantasy right now. This is the sort of idiocy hitherto limited to banks…

Dear Digg

Brilliant little hack by teh Groobs. I’ve always had the same feeling about Digg and its ilk, and this blast from the past framing thing sucks goat balls.